By Heather Kennedy
Have you ever found yourself talking to someone and realised they heard your words but did not really get your meaning? Or have you ever wondered why two people could experience the exact same conversation and yet have a totally different response?
What if you had the key to speak to people in such a way that you were both heard and understood?
Several years ago, I was introduced to a communication tool that has become that key for me – the Life Languages™. I have witnessed first hand how this scripturally based programme has revolutionised communication and relationships between individuals and couples and within families, workplaces and various types of teams and as a result I have become passionate about sharing the simple yet profound insights of this programme.
Before I tell you more about Life Languages let me tell you a little bit about my journey with this transformational tool.
Back in 2004 I was doing some ministry with a church in Canada and just before I left the pastor invited me to complete an online questionnaire which took about 20 minutes and generated a 21 page personalised profile. It was only as I settled in my seat on the plane home and started reading, that I realised just how personal and accurate that report was! How on earth could answering 80 or so questions, generate such an accurate picture of me? But what really struck me was how God had created me so perfectly for my then role of Associate Pastor in Christian Fellowship Church, Belfast.
It was also enlightening to learn what my specific communication style was and that to be truly effective in my communication, I needed to not only understand myself better, but to have insights into the person or group that I was communicating with. The possibilities of a tool that would open up this knowledge and insight really excited me and so in 2006, with the encouragement of my Senior Pastor, Paul Reid, I headed to Dallas, Texas for a week, to train as a Certified Trainer for the Life Languages Institute.
Since then I have had the privilege of introducing people all over Ireland, Scotland, England and even Thailand to this wonderful programme. I have worked with couples, families, church staff and leadership teams, several church based organisations and also some non-church groups. I have also found the tool very helpful in pastoral situations, in recruitment processes and even to help resolve conflict – the root of which is so often broken communication. Feedback from my fun and interactive Life Languages workshops, have always been very positive and it is a delight to see the transformational outcomes of this training in the lives of individuals as well as bringing positive and often much needed change to teams and groups.
Ok –so I know there are so many programmes, tools, personality profiles etc. out there – so what is so good about the Life Languages™ you ask?
Through your online profile you will learn that you communicate to varying degrees through 7 Life Languages™ – Mover, Doer, Influencer, Responder, Shaper, Producer and Contemplator – with one being your primary Life Languages™ that will guide your communication more than the others, but also have your weak (seventh) Life Languages™ that will tend to challenge you. Understanding these Life Languages™, what they mean and how they operate will give you valuable insights into your communication style and the communication style/needs of others. This understanding will increase your influence with everyone around you.
The Life Languages™ does much more than just introduce you to the 7 languages, but also highlights the filters we use and experience when communicating, as well as understanding the effect on your communication of your personal stress levels, needs, passions, interactive style, and learning style, all in one comprehensive report. The programme is scripturally based, although references to scriptures can be omitted when being presented to a non-church group.
Hence the Life Languages™ offers highly comprehensive and personal insight, but also encourages people to become “multilingual” i.e. able to understand and communicate in all 7 Life Languages to truly enhance your communication effectiveness. Some other profiles can have the tendency to put people in a “box”, classifying people and saying, “that’s just the way you are”, but the Life Languages™ system helps people understand “This is my Life Languages™ Profile, this is how I view the world, this is how I operate under stress, these are my strengths and weaknesses, but I also realise others may have a completely different way of seeing and experiencing things than I do and so I can choose to understand you and learn to speak your Life Languages™ too. That is revolutionary and can be life changing and relationship changing!
I am delighted to have the opportunity under Christians Who Lead to introduce you to this wonderful tool and if you are interested in finding out more, would be happy to chat further and explore how I might serve you and your team or organisation.
Heather Kennedy
Life Languages Certified Trainer